I'm a Naughty Woman!

I have been naughty for a plethora of reasons. For one, exercise has been minimal, which is why I haven't been posting. Secondly, yesterday I ate 2 late night pizza slices. Not just 1...2! A friend of my significant other put it into my head that technically it was tomorrow's points I was eating because it was after midnight. I stopped after eating the first piece, but the rest of the pizza was sitting there in front of my face and it smelled soooo good. I don't even like pizza, but there I was, reaching for another slice. I had already used about 17 of my flex points because for "some reason" my hunger has spiked this week.

Afterwards, I felt like crap, and I still do... I want to exercise tomorrow. Can somebody make me? I really need to earn some activity points to both feel better about my slip up and become more healthy.

But as they say, with each dark cloud there is a silver lining. I have not blogged about my Monday weigh-in, but I lost .6 pounds. I was a little disappointed, but as I had said last week, it wasn't my goal to lose. The weigh-in before I had lost almost 6 pounds in one week, so I was hoping (for my skin's sake) that the weight loss would slow down a little.

My next weigh-in is in two days and for the first time I am GENUINELY nervous because I feel that there is a possibility I might gain. I hadn't utilized more than 3 of my flex points TOTAL (to date) until this week and now I am quite sure I used more than I am alotted. It's hard to know because that pizza was from some obscure restaurant. Most likely it was an 18+ POINT binge.

I am not a fan of losing control. This is really bothering me.

(Please Read) Exercise Accountability Plan

My plan to make sure that I am held accountable for exercise is as follows:

EVERY DAY I will post what exercise I have done

Then, next Tuesday, I will post an exercise poll where I will ask people how they thought I did with a scale rating and they can post other comments or suggestions if they so wish.

I know this is like asking you all to do homework, but I really need help in this area.

Thanks in advance!

Belated Valentine's Day hugs and kisses,

Meg

WHOOO HOO!!!!

So last night was Monday night weigh-in at WW. I knew that I had lost a little too rapidly this week because I had a stomach bug, but that doesn't change the fact that I am SUPER exited that I have lost 10% of my original starting weight and am sneaking up on the 170's. About three weeks ago I set a goal that I would reach 184.2 by yesterday and I kinda blew that out of the water because my new current weight is...drumroll please... 180.4!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

However, I am still not doing very well with the exercise which is no bueno because I am starting to feel some excess skin hanging around in different places and that is something that can be helped by exercise. Again I am going to ask you to PLEASE HOLD ME ACCOUNTABLE. Whether it's yelling at me, encouraging me, or asking me to exercise. Whatever your style is, but the bottom line is that I need to enter exercise boot camp. The Biggest Loser weight-loss yoga DVD is awesome, but so hard to do! I need to suck it up! Lol.

For next week I do not have a weight loss goal. Next week I do not care if I lose. My goal is to start kicking up the exercise and weight training to help tighten my body up. Then, the following week, I hope to continue with the weight loss. I just feel I am losing a little too quickly for the negligible amount of exercise I have done. My belly is smaller, but jiggly with extra skin. Ew.

Trying to avoid emotional eating...

Right now is one of those times I could power through not just one, but yes, 2 pints of Ben and Jerry's ice cream...and not the light kind.

I feel so alone.

I wrote before that I realized that I wasn't loving myself before and now I am finally falling in love with me, but I still feel this empty spot. I am lonely! I am in dire need of a companion or close friend. Don't get me wrong, I have friends, but they all live far away and have their own busy lives. We just don't talk much.

Before this week I had 4 men (I generally have more male friends) that I talked to on a regular basis. I talked to them often and I didn't really feel lonely. Then almost all at once:

1.) 1 became a lot more busy in their life and just doesn't have the time for me anymore
1a/2.) after telling another person they didn't want them speaking to me
3.) Another male that I had been speaking to alot and was hoping to maybe date entered into a relationship over the weekend while I was dragging my feet and protecting my heart. It's my fault because I actually told them I only wanted to be friends, but I only did that so they would take the time to get to know me before anything romantic happened; I was trying to build a solid base.
4.) One guy that I had only been on 1 date with told me he wanted to be with me and asked me to move back to Massachussetts. I stopped talking to him for a few weeks and then he said he was willing to work on a friendship with me, so I began speaking with him again. But then, he starting talking about spending his life with me, I told him I questioned his mental status, and he stopped calling.

So here I am, single and lonely, with friends who never call. I would give anything for a companion or a friend right now. I have tried to push away feelings of envy over this Valentine's Day weekend. I am still bitter that my engagement failed terribly only 7 months ago. Everyone at work was talking about all these romantic things. One 71-year-old woman's husband came into the store with flowers behind his back and said, "My darling, we've lived our lives together 50 years so far, will you honor me by still being my valentine?" It was the sweetest thing I've seen because my relationships so far have been very weak on romance, but it was torture to hear and see these people with love in their lives.

Usually I have my family, but my mother is on a cruise for about 10 days. She is my best friend in this world and I already miss her dearly.

I need to find something to do on my two days off this week. Something to make me feel good that doesn't really cost a lot of money.

P.S. I am weighing in tomorrow, so check back soon for the weight update!

Current Measurements

Today I decided to measure myself...

I hadn't done this at the beginning because, frankly, I was too ashamed of what I thought the numbers were. Hehe. If that makes any sense to anyone other than myself :).

Hips: 43"
Natural Waist (which is actually above my belly button): 34"
Waist: 37"
Bust: 43"
Thighs: 27"
Calves: 15.5"
Biceps: 14 1/4"

Since I am now going to be adding in steady exercise...FOR REAL THIS TIME. PLEASE HOLD ME ACCOUNTABLE... I wanted to see if the inches truly "fall off". We shall see.

Off to work. Bye for now.

My First Mobile Post

I just realized that I can now post to my blog from my new Blackberry Storm. Apparently you can do this from any phone capable of sending MMS or email. So that is exactly what I am doing right now. I kind of feel like Rev Run from MTV's Run's House except that I would never bring this phone to the tub; protection plan or not.

So, for the past two days I have had a horrible stomach virus. It seems I may reach 10% this week, but not quite the way I had imagined. We shall see on Monday. My body may adjust and hold on to everything I eat for the rest of the week.

Week 5: Monday Night Weigh-in

The weight-loss seems to have started slowing down a bit. I was warned that this would happen. It seems my body has gotten used to the changes I made to be successful thus far, so I need to change things up. Number 1 is that I need to exercise more! This week I don't think I really exercised at all except for when I was finishing up with the move on Saturay. I need to exercise. Would somebody please kick me in the booty?

So, the weight loss this week was 1.4 pounds. My current weight is 186.2, bringing my total weight loss to 18 pounds. I am 2 pounds away from the 20 pound/10 percent marker. I am going to try my hardest to meet this goal by next Monday's weigh-in. This was the due date I had set and I am going to do all I can to accomplish this by staying on program and exercising more.

Monday Night Weigh-in

I was so nervous today! I wore the lightest clothing possible to the weigh-in and everything...

I should not have been such a mess about the whole thing. Everything worked out and balanced just fine. I lost another 3.2 pounds this week, totalling 16.6! I am so excited and proud of myself; losing weight is something I've been saying I'll do, but now I've actually stuck to a plan for a month and I don't plan on stopping.

I feel better, my clothes fit better or are too big, I'm wearing old jeans, and I don't feel tired all the time. I used to always feel tired and I couldn't sleep enough to satisfy me. Now I am starting to even wake up before my alarm, and on days off when I don't set it, I wake up fairly early.

Tonight I bought a bottle of "REAL" Sangria imported from Spain...or so the bottle says, to celebrate. It's 2 points per 4 ounces, so I am going to mix it with sparkling water to have 2 spritzers :).

With other things going wrong, it feels nice to have something to celebrate.

A Little Worried

Tomorrow is my weigh-in and even though I have added in exercise I am a little worried. I seem to be bloating and I'm kind of t'd off that maybe my weight loss won't be maximized because of that.

If I don't lose this week I hope that I will be able to stay positive and that it will only further motivate me.

Yesterday I had a light beer and 1.5 slices of Pizza Hut all natural pizza. Could that have done it?

GRRRRRRRRR!! I only ate 1 of my reserve points earlier in the week.

Maybe I am just being paranoid. Everything will be ok and I am doing the best I can.