Totus and Lotus

On Monday morning 2 new crea were born on our Alpaca farm. Whether or not they are twins, we are unsure of, but that would be very rare. What's more likely? 2 crea born on the same day with different mothers, or an opposite sex pair of twins with one nursing off of another pregnant alpaca?

The Weight is almost over

I CANT BELIEVE IT!!!! I'VE LOST 61.2 POUNDS!!


I am getting so close to my goal weight that I can almost taste it! 9 months ago I never would have imagined I'd weigh under 180 pounds. Apparently, at that time, I didn't know how serious I really was about getting healthy. Today I weighed in at 143! I'm down 2.4 from last week and 13 pounds away from goal. This last week I worked out 3 times for 20 minutes. This week my goal is to maintain that level of activity or increase it. I started off this morning with a workout, so I already have one session under my belt.

On the other side of things:

I'm getting a little nervous. I've gotten extremely good at losing weight in a healthy way, but pretty soon I'm going to have to maintain the weight loss, That's a scary thought! It doesn't matter if you have to lose 20 pounds, 60, or 200 because we all go through the same trials to lose each pound; the real challenge is maintenance.

30 Day Shred-Day 3

Today was my third day of semi-following the 30 Day Shred Program. Yesterday I was still mad at Jillian (scroll down to see my Jillian Michaels rant from a couple days ago), so I switched over to Bob. After going out to Koto and eating a chunk of my bonus points in shumai, I decided I needed and old-fashioned butt kicking, so I ran back to Jillian and bumped it up to level two. All I can say is, wow... it was a very high intensity, 20 minutes workout. I think I am going to go pass out. Good night!

Activity Playlist

For the past couple of weeks I have been getting into using fitness DVDs to increase my activity level, but I kept on running into a problem. The person telling me what to do was obviously trapped inside my TV and could not do a thing about whether I was following their instructions. Although it would be nice if they could, I cannot afford a personal trainer, so I found a solution. I compiled a playlist to blast while I work out along with the tiny people in my television. In all seriousness, it really helped me focus on the movements and the repetitions flew by.

Here are some songs that keep me going:

Monday Night Weigh-in

This week I lost 1.2 pounds and I'm completely ok with that. Now if I lose 1.2 more next week, I'll have lost a total of 60 pounds! This was a hard 1.2 to lose. After a couple weeks of slacking off, I really buckled down on activity and tracking this week. For next week, one of my nutrition goals is to eat less pre-packaged food. I also need to try and get in enough fluid, especially since I'm being more active.

Approximately 15 pounds til goal weight. The high end of my reccommended weight is 137 and I picked 130, which is somewhere in the middle. As I get closer to goal, I'll see how I feel in my body and maybe I will decide I want to be heavier. People have been assuming I am very close to my goal and are wondering if I will look too thin 15 pounds lighter. One lady at my WW meeting tonight joked that if I lost any more weight I'd have to put weights on my ancles. I am fairly lean and muscular already, maybe I should revise my goal???

Jillian Michaels Rant

Did anyone know that Jillian Michael's product line includes the Quickstart Rapid Weight Loss System. Made famous on NBC's hit show The Biggest Loser as a role model, health and wellness expert, and motivor, she has now bought herself sell-out status in my eyes. The woman that once inspired me to lose weight the hard way and suck it up, is now putting her name on DIET PILLS! I'm sorry, she refers to them as supplements. I really don't care if they are filled with all natural ingredients or cocaine; they are diet pills. Just because something is natural doesn't mean that it's good for you and we all know the general rule of thum when putting crap into your body: once you stop taking it, it makes it harder for your body to do it naturally.

On TV and on her website, she preaches about going the all natural and organic route. Wouldn't one think that the most natural way to lose weight is to eat well and exercise? The eye-popping ad I stumbled upon today states, "We all know that if you want to lose weight, you need to reduce your caloric intake. It sounds simple, but the truth is, if it were that easy, most of us wouldn't be overweight in the first place." Upon reading this, I became enraged. I just bought once of her DVD's! I wouldn't have purchased it had I known she endorses quick fixes for weight-loss. Sure, I will grant that eating well is NOT easy for many of us, and obviously it is a problem for those of us who have been or are overweight, but that doesn't mean we have to be the victim of food. We can take control.

Before I made the conscious decision to join Weight Watchers and take control of my health I believed that I didn't have the willpower I once had. I felt powerless. At one point I had the thought that even if I wanted to "become" anorexic again (a ludicrous thought in itself), I wouldn't have the will to stick it out. I also had fallen into the habit of blaming a sluggish metabolism. That was only a crutch. On this journey I have discovered how easy it is rev up your metabolism; all it takes is hard work, but once you get going it is, inways, a little easier.

I am very upset that this woman I looked up to has compromised her integrity by putting her name on this type of product. It contradicts many things she has said in her career...things that have inspired hundreds of thousands of people to deal with their baggage, drop their excuses, and take things into their own, capable hands.

30 Day Shred- Day 2!!

Yatta! I worked until 9 tonight, but I still earned some AP's. After getting out of work at 1:30am last night, there was no way it was going to happen this morning, so I was nervous. I should have had some more faith in myself. I CAN include activity in my life. I can do this, I can be healthy, and I should MAKE that time for myself because I deserve it. I've incorporated 2 work outs into my schedule this week. That's up from 0 over the past couple of weeks. This is a huge improvement for me.

Over the past several months, I've made a lot of excuses, but now I'm going to focus on making time.

Weigh-in is tomorrow :/. I'm a little worried. I've worked harder and tracked religiously this week. If I don't see the results, I know I'll be disappointed with the number (but still pleased with myself). I've stepped on the scale several times this week and the number hasn't budged.

I was hoping that if I worked hard I could come up with a 1-2 pound loss, but I don't think it's going to happen this week.

Involuntary Day Off

It was not my intention to skip a day, but I didn't anticipate that a 20 minute workout would make me so sore! When I woke up this morning my calves were so sore that I could hardly walk; anything that involved going on tip-toe or lunging forward was out of the question. I swear that I am not being a lazy bum!

I worked through the pain for 9 hours on concrete. I just got out of work @ 1:30am and it's now getting close to 3. Off to bed so that I can be active tomorrow before work.

30 Day Shred- Day 1

Today, or maybe I should say yesterday, I completed my first day of the 30 Day Shred DVD workouts. Overall I was happy with the workout, but next time I would like to listen to better music while doing it. More than anything, I am just happy that I did it. I almost didn't. Once again, I was SOOOO close to putting myself on the back burner, but I was vigilant. 

The day is not over yet

...but so far I have not included activity. I spent most of the afternoon walking around the mall, however. I needed to get some dress pants that fit, so that I can be well dressed at job interviews and NY&Co was having a sale on pants and jeans (buy one get one FREE!). From there I browsed the bookstore for a while, then it was off to the other side of the mall to Target where I picked up some all natural chicken breast tenders, some lunch meat, Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred DVD, and a jump rope. I have left Target the past couple of times without stopping at Starbucks for my skinny cinnamon dolce latte, so today I indulged. After that it was off to JCPenney to spend my $10 gift that I clipped from last week's flyer. I ended up buying this casual/physical activity shirt for $2.07 out of pocket:

Of course I could leave the mall without chatting up a couple of the cell phone kiosk guys; talking about the new cellular technologies and which phones we liked best, but I finally did leave. Would you call that activity? I have some sores on my feet that would suggest it.

This morning I made the mistake of eating a pathetic breakfast. All I had was a WW yogurt. I was going to have some corn bran, but apparently I forgot when I was busy writing out interview questions. When I got home from the mall I was starving! I made a quick 3 POINT sandwich to take the edge off, but I had to eat again almost immediately. I had some haddock, brown rice, and zucchini; leftovers from a couple of days ago. I still have a dull headache from letting my blood sugar get so low, but my appetite is still not suppressed with 13 points left for the day. I close for the next two nights, so tonight I will be staying up late tonight in preparation and I want to make sure I switch over to a closing eating schedule. That is, breakfast at 11 (or when I wake up), lunch right before work at 3, and dinner whenever business slows enough for me to eat. I loathe my constantly changing schedule!

I think I might still pop in the Shred DVD. Hmmm...

Ruby! -Time to become uncomfortable

This is Ruby, a star on the Style Network. I love watching her show to gain motivation. If she can get up off of the couch, so can I. A couple of episodes ago she spoke a lot about how emotional this journey is for her, more so than she ever thought. All of her friends had trauma in their past that triggered their food addictions, but she had never seen herself as an emotional eater until recently. Ruby is buckling down by attacking her past and digging into exercise; pushing herself out of the comfort zone. 

Maybe that's how I need to approach "activity". I just read that on a message board (thanks). Someone wrote that one way to begin conquering exercise is to refer to it as activity instead. I think this type of reframing might work. Exercise, at least for me, has a negative connotation. Even when I just say the word in my head it makes me grouchy; it brings out the stubborn in me and I can't help but to dig in my heels and do something else just to spite it. 

Tomorrow is a new day. I am going to be more active, but I need HELP! Please hold me accountable. I will report back on it every day even if all I write is "I did nothing to increase my activity level today".

Couch Potato Fever

As of late, I've noticed that I've spent a lot of quality time with the couch when I am not at work because I unfortunately like watching TV. When I was growing up, that's what the adults did when they came home (along with making dinner and smoking cigarettes). It's just relaxing! Now that the average household in America has a DVR or Tivo, it's even easier to watch your favorite shows at your convenience. Some of my favorites are The Biggest Loser, Ruby, Food Network Challenge, Ace of Cakes, So You Think You Can Dance, and American Idol. Many of those shows aren't on right now, but re-runs I haven't seen are. Grrr!

Today I got home from work at 8. I went to bed somewhat on time last night so that I could get up and maybe do some yoga, but no... I also didn't exercise tonight. When I got home from work I was ravenously hungry! I ended up having a WW meal because it was too late to cook. I had the rice and beans with a cup of peas for a total of 8 points. After eating I got sucked into the Food Network for a while, but was finally able to get off of the couch. I did some cleaning/laundry/organizing. I needed to get a bin of clothes ready to sell! I have an appointment on Friday to have this consignment shop look at some of my old clothes. I'm planning on using the money from the sales to buy some new fall and winter clothing. If only they would take the wedding dress I never wore then I'd be able to get new snow tires, too!

It feels awesome to be getting rid of my old clothes. Are you kidding?! Even a few years ago the clothes I'm letting go of were considered my "skinny clothes". All these years I never knew how to eat and just made excuses, mostly blaming a sluggish metabolism, when I could have been a hot mama all along. 

Speaking of metabolism, I'm off to find some support with this whole exercise thing. I'm so sick of not exercising that I might just do it. 

Monday night weigh in

I am thankful that I did not gain this week. With less than 20 pounds left to lose, I can't really lose focus of my goals. They say that the last pounds are the hardest to shed, so its time to step it up!

This week I slacked off and the scale reflected the lack of effort. This week I will plan in exercise. I was very successful the last time I did that. The meeting will be starting soon. I will get back to this later.

I'm a bum

I had the entire weekend off and what did I do? Pretty much nothing. If it wasn't for my significant other, I would never have left the couch. I spend so much time running around on my feet at work that perhaps I felt I had to balance things out. In the past couple of days I have slept more than 24 hours and when I was not sleeping I indulged in a West Wing Marathon. The West Wing, by the way, is a witty political drama that will knock your socks off, so if you don't know what to add to your Netflix or Blockbuster queue, give it a try.

I'm wondering about weigh-in. Last week I had a 2 pound loss and I didn't track. I started the day out by tracking, but I never ended it that way. I got lucky. This week I had the same bad habit. I also indulged in some wine, lost count when popping pistachios, and had a giant slice of pizza. Even if the scale shows me I slacked off, I'm not going to get upset about it, but I will be refocusing my energy this week.

I've been very upset about work and am in need of a lifestyle change professionally. It's been getting me down. I will not lie and say I have not been doing some emotional eating because I have.